Breakups are just a part of life as an adult. Relationships come and go, and as we change through the years, sometimes we realise that the partner we have spent a long time with isn’t actually right for us.
Whether the breakup was mutual, you ended it, or they called things off, heartbreak is inevitable and there are few things that will happen in the weeks and months that follow.
7 Things That Will Happen After A Bad Breakup
YOU WILL FEEL LIKE IT WAS YOUR FAULT
Whether you were the one to end things, or they ended it with you, if you have just been through a bad breakup then chances are that soon after, you are going to feel like it was your fault that things went wrong.
Truth is, some things will be your fault, but some of the issues will also be thanks to the other person. No relationship is perfect, and some are much more toxic than others, but whatever the situation, it takes at least two people to make a relationship end, so never feel like only you are to blame.
If you were the one to end it, it might show that you are the stronger person. If you have just come from a very toxic relationship where both of you were suffering, then it probably took a lot of strength to finally call things off, especially if you still love that person but understand that you are better off apart.
YOU WILL FEEL GUILTY
Similarly, you might feel guilty that things ended. It’s natural to replay the events of the past in your head and try to work out if things would have turned out differently if you had made better decisions.
Try to avoid doing this to yourself, it’s just going to drain your energy and make it much more difficult for you to move on and find happiness.
YOU WILL ALWAYS WONDER IF THEY ARE OK
You will think of that person a lot and wonder if they are okay. You will wonder if they have moved on, have they met somebody else, are they looking after themselves and are they coping alright.
This is natural, and it would be cold and shallow of you not to have these thoughts. If you were together a long time then, of course, you are going to want to know if they are okay and if they’re handling the breakup well.
Try to avoid reaching out to them though. This will just make it more difficult for both of you to move on and could even result in you getting back together even if you know that’s not in either of your best interests.
YOU WILL START TO MIX WITH NEW PEOPLE
Slowly, as you start to heal, you will start to want to spend time with your friends again. You’ll want to start going out, finding new hobbies and meeting new people.
This is the most exciting part of the end of a relationship as it truly marks the beginning of a new chapter and there are so many new opportunities that you will soon discover.
YOUR SELF ESTEEM WILL REBUILD
If you were in a relationship with somebody who didn’t treat you right, chances are that when you first break up, your self esteem will be pretty poor.
However, now that you have removed yourself from that situation, you have the chance to rebuild your confidence and self worth. Before you know it, all the things that people used to do and say to make you feel like you weren’t good enough, will be distant echoes and they will no longer determine how you view yourself.
Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, who will build you up and make you feel good about yourself, and before you know it, your self esteem will be miles ahead of where you started from.
YOU WILL REFLECT ON WHY IT WENT WRONG
Time is the ultimate healer and as time moves forward, you will spend a lot of it thinking about what made things go wrong in the first place.
It might be that there was cheating, lying or deception involved, or it might be as simple as the two of you didn’t take the time to communicate properly and that led to arguments and misunderstanding each other.
This time of reflection is a brilliant chance for you to take a look at yourself in the mirror, and really make up your mind whether there are qualities of your own personality that you can work on and improve so that your next relationship doesn’t follow the same pattern as your last.
CHANGE ISN’T AS SCARY AS YOU THOUGHT
Lastly, one of the scariest things about ending a relationship can be the massive change to your lifestyle that comes along with it.
Whether this is the end of a more causal relationship or a long term marriage, your life will inevitably change drastically as the coupling draws to a close.
With breakups often comes moving home, changes in financial situation, losing an extended family or friend group and even losing a beloved pet that you may have shared.
However, with change also comes the opportunity for huge growth and the chance for you to find real true happiness if you didn’t have that in that relationship. So rather than dreading the idea of change in your life, you will quickly realise that your survival skills are much stronger than you ever realised, and this change might bring new aspects to your life that make you happier than you have ever been.
To Finish Off…
I hope that this article was helpful and that you were able to relate if you have just been through a breakup, or if you are thinking of ending things with your current partner, that reading this made the idea seem less terrifying.
If you have any tips or advice for others who might be in a similar situation then please leave a comment below and let’s help each other grow and move on from past experiences.